Non-Judgement, A Key Ingredient to Happiness
My mind has been going a million miles a minute lately. I have so much I want to talk about, but I keep getting distracted, or something comes up, or I have another epiphany about what my next blog post should be- for the 10th time. All of this is fun for when I have free time and just want to write and outline, not for when I’m on the clock and need to be putting words onto (digital) paper for publishing. I am trying to start a business, I have goals and deadlines and I am getting in my own way. It’s very frustrating… or it would be except I have adopted a new philosophy in my life. Its called non-judgement and once you embrace it and implement it in your life, things will change in a big way!
What is Non-Judgement?
The definition of the word judgement is an opinion or conclusion (via good ol’ Google), hopefully an educated conclusion or opinion but that is, unfortunately, not always a requirement. So then non-judgement would be the absence of an opinion or conclusion.
Can you even wrap your head around that? I couldn’t at first.
I’m supposed to live how? Not having an opinion on the way other’s do things? Myself included? Impossible!!
But guess what, it’s totally possible! Difficult at first, but possible. This would be a good time to turn to a previous blog post about self-talk and self-bullying. Go ahead and read that one real quick, it will come in handy because non-judgement absolutely will require you to practice positive self-talk. It’s a good one, I promise…
Ok! Now that you have an understanding of how to be positive with yourself, this whole non-judgement thing is going to get easier.
Why is Non-Judgement important
When we make a judgement about something or someone, we are making a conclusion and therefore closing off our mind. By judging, you add an emotional connection, and changing that connection at a later time will be difficult. When we keep our minds open and just observe, we gain knowledge and freedom! It’s not your job to judge, that’s way too big for us mere mortals. Our job is just to live, to witness life and every little thing that goes into it. The more we observe and just take in without making judgements, the more we can just experience things and take life for what it is. Why take on the extra burden of judging and deciding how something is or isn’t? No one has any need for that!
How do we practice non-judgement everyday?
Let’s start with ourselves. How can we be non-judgmental with ourselves? We know we are not perfect, a lot of times people even feel like they are not up to par with the majority of others.
I am a being with imperfections. Those imperfections make me different from anyone else. My imperfections are apart of me and are never something I should be sorry for or ashamed of.
When we turn on acceptance and turn off all of the extra emotions, we can see things for what they are and not need to label it as right or wrong. It just is. I know I am someone who gets going on an idea and then gets distracted by something else. I have been that way my whole life and I will probably always be that way. Along with being loud, emotional, and a wild, free-spirit. Those are just part of who I am. God made me that way, and that’s just that. By choosing to accept instead of judge and label as good or bad, we allow ourselves to enjoy our lives more. We chose not to get stressed out trying to change things we cannot, we just accept them.
OWN IT! EMBRACE IT! LOVE IT! Once you start owning who you are, you can start to live authentically to yourself and this is absolutely the combination that will lead you to happiness! More than just accepting something as being a part of who you are, own it and make the most of it. I look at my being distracted easily, as seeing a way to get more (little) things done in a day. It’s true that my posts take longer to write, I just make sure I set appropriate deadlines. However, I can also be sure to schedule more small things to get done on my to-do list, and seeing all of those small tasks done makes me feel good about myself!
I not only accept it, but I plan my day accordingly, to make me feel like I am making the most of it. So own it and use it to help fuel you, however you need to!
Now let’s look at how we can apply this practice to others. Not judging others for things they do or don’t do.
Open Your Mind
When we start judging others, normally it’s for something that we see that we don’t agree with or think is right. What we don’t see is the bigger picture, the path that this person is on right now. We need to train our minds to be open to accepting other’s journey’s. We need to try to see it from their point of view and think about what kind of journey that person might be on and why they might be acting that way. When we start trying to see people on their own path, we become more empathetic and can gain more knowledge about how other people work and think.
Be Like a Child
Children are always curious and seek to know more, however they are not quick to judge. They approach life with a bright curiosity and no need to make conclusions, just a desire to learn. We need to look at life through curious eyes, with no intention of judging only observing. Our desire shouldn’t be to put a label on something or someone, it should be just to learn about the world around us.
As always, I like to give a reminder on these posts about transforming ourselves that life is a journey. We are going to hit bumps, we are going to slip and up and judge ourselves too harshly one day and the next we may even judge someone else for something. Don’t let those slip ups deter you. Get yourself in check, remind yourself of how you want to be and do it. Rinse and repeat whenever needed. That’s what the journey is all about.
I thank you so much for taking the time to read my words. I hope that I have inspired you and instilled in you some practices you can apply in your life. Non-judgement is a practice that will bring you so much joy and happiness. You will feel a sence of freedom when those negative thoughts and ideas are gone. It truly is amazing.
Namaste my fellow journey-mates. Always remember you were made special because you are different from anyone else. Embrace everything that comes with that!
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